I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
