all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Randomize
