She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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