Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
