I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
