even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
