is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
