how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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