I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
