you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize
