If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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