Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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