my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Dear god my vagina.
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