Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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