dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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