well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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