how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
