He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
