Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
she smelled like a LAN party
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
