That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
