I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
