Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
