I can't breathe out the right side of my face
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
