i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
I've blown a few things in my day
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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