The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
