i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
