Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
