how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
how do you play pong handcuffed?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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