I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
He? As in you personified your dick?
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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