I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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