but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
