She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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