I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
