Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
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