everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Randomize
