I wannas sexs uuuuu
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
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