i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
