hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
