I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
