feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
Randomize
