She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
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