The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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