Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
You're like the curious george of whores
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
