I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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