I CAN MOONWALK!
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
