Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I wish i was in the wii world.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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