i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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