White coat. Heels.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
