By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
