He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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