i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
this just has baby written all over it
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Randomize
