Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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